slut!Harper Muse: Aw, c’mon… just a teeny tiny little PWP?

M: No!

pouty!Tyr Muse: Sexually frustrated Nietzscheans are not pleasant to be around.

M: Go bug Rivier, she needs some encouragement for her Viking fic.

H: *makes a face* But she’s writing an innocent!Harper fic.

M: He’s only innocent for the first few pages.  Then there’s a Viking gangbang.  I think.

H: Really?  *perks up*  I might take a little look over there…

reluctant!Dylan Muse: What’s going on?  Slut!Harper just dragged innocent!Harper out from under the drier and stuffed him in a suitcase.  Why are the Harpers leaving?  Was it something I said?  Or did?  Damn, I should have checked which one I was spanking last night.

T: Relax, they’ll be back.  And that wasn’t a Harper muse you were spanking: it was the Iolaus muse, didn’t you see the carrot?

D: Carrot?  I thought it was just the Hobbits who had carrots?

T: She got a much better screencap of Iolaus fellating a carrot last night.  The woman is obsessed.

M: Hey!  I’m not obsessed, I just like carrots, and Iolaus fellating anything has to be a good thing, right?

*short pause for mental image*

D: She has a point.

T: Yes, and with slut!Harper gone for the rest of the month…

D: Which end do you want?

T: Aren’t you supposed to be a reluctant muse?

D: Oh.  Yeah.  Damn.

M: Think of it as a public service: the Iolaus muse hasn’t had any action since The Love Bug.

D: Hmmm?

M: It’s your duty as captain, and senior porn muse, to relieve that poor guy’s sexual tension.

D: *big smile*  Thank you.  It’s a tough job, but someone has to do it.

M: Yup, of course… Tyr seems to be way ahead of you there.  Oooh, in the garden?  Isn’t that rather cold at this time of year?

D: Tyr!  Stop that!  Or at least wait for me!

M: *slams door and locks it*  Finally!  Maybe now I can get some work done.

horny!Hobbit Muse: Yes!  The drom muses are gone.  Now the bunnies are mine!  All mine!  Bwah ha ha ha!

M: Uhm… one Hobbit muse?

HH: I’m generic.  Because you can’t decide which one is more shaggable.  Carrot?

M: Thanks… maybe later.  What are you doing here anyway?  I announced a muse holiday two weeks ago.

HH: Um… the Nazgul chased me here?

M: Nice try, now out, before I shove that carrot where the sun doesn’t shine.

HH: *blinks*

M: Oh.  Right.  That isn’t a threat, it’s a come on.  Fine.  Out before I snap your carrot in half. 

HH: *gasp*  You wouldn’t!

M: Try me, you androgynous little twerp.

HH: Uh, I’ll just be out in the garden.

M: Fine, don’t forget your red hat and your fishing rod!

sexy!Lex Muse: Are they gone yet?

M: Yup, you can come out now.

L: Good, the blushing!Clark muse’s cheeks were giving me sunburn.